Because I am lost. So very very lost. My decision making skills seem to have completely abandoned me, leaving me with nothing. Of course, decisions still come my way, whether my brain is working or not, so needless to say, I haven't been making the best choices lately. So now, as I'm trying to sort out my life and fall asleep at the same time, I find myself thinking back on all the things that have happened recently. So much.
I'm in a fight with one of my best friends. For some reason, I'm not talking to another. One asked me for advice, and needless to say, its not really the best time for that. I have felt empty recently. Like for some reason I CANT be happy. I don't know why. I realized that I needed to seek some help from God, and I've really been trying, but I find myself feeling that that is hopeless too. Now I don't even feel like I am making sense.
I don't know what I need or what will help. I certainly can't trust myself to think of a solution. Who knows what I would end up with! But I am just going to try to live each day with an open mind. Try to let my smile be real and not fake. Let simple things make me happy. Maybe I'm looking too hard for happiness.
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